Diabetic Boyfriend Troubles?
I (19) have been going out with my boyfriend (26) for a year, he is a badly controlled type 1 diabetic since he was 3 and during the summer I had to call ambulances many times and even when I was away, I had to call 999 and they found him unconscious. In August this happened again but he went into a coma for 3 weeks, his family moved him to Scotland and I decided to take a year out and to stay with him. He has needed my support everyday so I have been unable to work since and he is still in hospital.
Before he went into a coma, I was unsure of whether I wanted to still be with him and now he is back to almost normal I am having the same feelings. I love him and he often says he loves me yet he sometimes seems very selfish, moody and ungrateful of what I have given up to support him (he was like this too before the coma)
He seems to not have learned from this ordeal and has told me he is not going to try and be a better diabetic and I’m just not sure whether I can cope with the constant worry especially when he is so ungrateful at times.
What can I do to help him? He completly hates everyone in his family that has tried to help him but I don’t think I can just sit and watch him eat 6 bags of crisps, washed down with Lucozade anymore! He never used to test his blood sugar (before the coma) He has no feeling in his feet and had ulcers all over his lower legs and feet (although thankfully they have mostly healed now due to being in hospital)
Thanks in advance for replies.
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This is really sad to be so young and have such a terrible disease. But I have 5 friends that are diabetic and 2 of which were diagnosed in their teens. They take good care of themselves and are doing fine. However, your boyfriend has to help himself and be willing to take care of himself. Until he does this, he will continue to have these episodes and it will eventually lead him to his grave. Sorry to be so blunt but this is what happens to diabetics who refuse to eat right and take care of themselves. I really don’t know what to tell you about coping, I guess I’d have to be in your shoes. I say follow your gut. Best of Luck. I hope he sees what he is doing to you and decides to do better.
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You can’t help him. You can enable him. And( no ) he does not love you.If he did he would take care of himself. He will die young and leave you with Kids and a broken Heart. He is one selfish person. He’s a user! Dump him! I would not even give him an explanation. He will work that out by himself. Remember depression is a complication of diabetes. And if he doe not want help there is nothing you can do. Your gut feeling is right on. Use your head and break free and get someone that deserves you.
Sorry to talk against a diabetic, but this is a case of planned *******. And I have compassion , but don’t feel sorry for him.
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What is it you love about this loser? Do you just want a guy that you can be a nurse to forever? Those ulcers will be back soon, and will take longer and longer to heal. He’ll have a leg amputation soon from all the damage.
Sadly, he hasn’t learned anything about being a diabetic in 23 years, or for whaterver reason he just doesn’t care about dying. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but if he can’t take care of himself he will never be able to take care of you and any kids you want to have in the future. Diabetes can be controlled. He must work with a doctor who can re-teach him everything he seems to have forgotten about taking insulin and eating properly. He seems to have a death wish.
This guy is selfish and irresponsible and sounds like a terrible boyfriend.
You can’t help this guy. He has to help himself.
You didn’t ask, but I don’t think you should stay with this guy. Maybe losing you will send him a signal that it is time to change?
Create a video blog…instantly.
I agree with Tin S. I dated someone who had Type 1 diabetes and he never took care of himself. His sugars were always 300, 400, sometimes even higher than that. He was depressed and felt like he had the worst life ever. I couldn’t sympathize when my job is working with people who have Mental Illnesses and Developmental Disabilities. It didn’t matter how much I was nice and tried to help him. And then how much “tough love” I gave to push him. Nothing mattered and after a little over a year we split up. I begged him to show me that he cared for me by taking care of himself. If he wouldn’t do it for him then I was hoping he’d do it for me. It didn’t work. I **** to tell you but if your boyfriend doesn’t want to help himself then you can’t help him either.
Look up Diabetes Burnout. It really is a condition. I gave my boyfriend all the information I had researched on it but he wouldn’t read it…maybe yours will.